Welcome to the Empty Arms blog!

“Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone.”
― Fred Rogers

This December will be the tenth anniversary of my first Empty Arms meeting.  I don’t know how I would have survived without the group.  I was so afraid to go that my husband had to   make the initial call for information.  I was afraid the other people there wouldn’t think my loss counted.  I lost my babies at 5, 7 and 11 weeks.  Some women wouldn’t have even known they were pregnant.  What if nobody understood?  What if all these other women had lost ‘real’ babies–babies who were holdable, babies with birth certificates, babies everyone knew about?  Only a handful of people even knew MY babies had ever existed at all.  I was wrong to be afraid, and I’ve never been more relieved to be wrong.

At Empty Arms, we can talk about our babies.  Everyone understands that we need to talk about them.  Everyone believes that they are real.  We stop feeling quite as crazy for all the things that we are feeling.  Because it turns out, we’re not the only ones with those feelings.  We’re not alone, no matter how alone we feel out there in the rest of the world.  Talking helps.  Listening helps, even if we can’t bring ourselves to talk.  Knowing there are others who feel the same weight makes the burden a little easier to carry.

I hope that this blog will give us all another place to share that weight.  Please feel free to contact me if you’d like to add a post.  This is our page.  Apologies if I get a bit wordy, or post too often.  Several of you have told me you’ve found my writings helpful, so I’ll be trying to pass them on as regularly as possible.  But I’m really  hoping I won’t be the only one!

Thanks for stopping by to share the weight.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s